Nov 18, 2014
10 Things We’d Rather Do On NYE Than Attend Borgore’s Slumber Party

The most offensive thing with a PA system this New Year’s Eve won’t be Ryan Seacrest. Borgore has planned a New Year’s Eve Slumber Party at Pacha New York that looks to be full of enough confused junior college dropouts to open a brand new strip club. Since the very idea of sleeping anywhere near Borgore makes us want to drop everything and take a shower (or a morning-after pill), here are 10 things we’d rather do for New Year’s Eve than attend Borgore’s Slumber Party:

1. Attend R.Kelly’s Slumber Party

Bunk up with the Bump & Grinder himself?
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2. Attend A DMV Seminar On License Renewal

You like this option? Get in line.
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3. Pay Taxes In Advance Through 2020

Yep.
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4. Clean Up After Borgore’s Slumber Party

Prob still wanna wear protection tho.
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5. Spoon With A Homeless Man

Relatively speaking, he’s kinda cute.
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6. Eat Broken Glass

Unlike Borgore, stomachable with ranch.
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7. Listen To Borgore’s Music

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8. Look For Parking…

…All Night
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9. Triple Root Canal

Sign us up.
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10. Stay At Home

borgore slumber party NYE alternatives

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