HOLY SHIP, we wish we were on that big-ass floating festie. But seriously, it was totally not jealousy and something completely different that got us thinking: What would make EDM’s finest take over a ship and name themselves captain in outrage? We have a few ideas.
1. Start a rumor Paris is DJing
Sorry, P. No foam or diamonds here.
2. Ban bikinis and pasties.
What did we even come for then?
3. Install pattern combination locks on cabin doors instead of using keycards
Who can even do these sober?
4. Hold a fire drill every morning at 7AM.
I’ll just burn to death instead, thank you.
5. Close the bar at 2 a.m.
6. Close the ice cream and pizza buffet ever
MSC Divina’s Piazza del Doge: Perfect for the munchies.
7. Provide only one computer with internet and no wi-fi
We must broadcast every detail for our friends to make them jealous!
8. Make it a smoke-free cruise
9. Ban twerking.
The mating call of every desperate girl, and the easiest way for guys to identify them